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Nature Tapes EP

by Lemon Demon

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1.
I had a dream that I was wearing a really cool wig. (A really cool wig. A really cool wig.) Cuz I was Google Image Searching for a really cool wig. (A really cool wig. A really cool wig.) AND IT WAS REALLY COOL. AND IT WAS REALLY FLY. I WISH I COULD REMEMBER WHAT THE FUCK IT LOOKED LIKE. MOST OF MY FRIENDS WERE JEALOUS, EXCEPT MY BLIND FRIENDS. IF ONLY THEY COULD SEE my really cool wig. my really cool wig. my really cool wig. And I was at a party hanging out with Mos Def. Nobody else was dancing so I danced with Mos Def. (I danced with Mos Def. I danced with Mos Def.) WE DID AN AWESOME DANCE. WE HAD AN AWESOME TIME. WE STARTED MAKING OUT, BUT THEN SOME PIZZA ARRIVED -- FUCK YES! WE ATE THE WHOLE PIZZA, AND THE ENTIRE TIME I NEVER TOOK OFF my really cool wig. my really cool wig. my really cool wig. MY REALLY COOL WIG. MY REALLY COOL WIG. MY REALLY COOL WIG. MY MEGA RAD WIG. MY HELLA SWEET WIG. MY HOLY SHIT WIG. I WISH I COULD REMEMBER WHAT IT LOOKED LIKE. I WISH I COULD REMEMBER WHAT IT LOOKED LIKE. When I woke up I was feeling pretty good, I must say. (I really felt great. I really felt great.) I started Google Image Searching for my wig right away. (Before it could fade. Before it could fade) I LOOKED AT EVERY PICTURE. I SPENT A LOT OF TIME. BUT I COULD NOT REMEMBER WHAT THE FUCK IT LOOKED LIKE. I DON'T WANT FAME AND FORTUNE. I DON'T WANT A HAPPY LIFE. I JUST WANT TO DIE IN my really cool wig. my really cool wig. my really cool wig. MY REALLY COOL WIG. MY REALLY COOL WIG. MY REALLY COOL WIG. MY WICKED TIGHT WIG. MY CRAZY SICK WIG. MY GANGSTA ASS WIG. I WISH I COULD REMEMBER WHAT IT LOOKED LIKE. I WISH I COULD REMEMBER WHAT IT LOOKED LIKE.
2.
Two Trucks 04:04
Two trucks having sex Two trucks having sex My muscles, my muscles Involuntarily flex Two trucks having sex Two trucks having sex My muscles, my muscles Involuntarily flex TWO PICKUP TRUCKS MAKING LOVE AMERICAN MADE BUILT FORD TOUGH TWO BEAUTIFUL MURDER MACHINES AMERICAN ANGELS IN THE SKY GROWN MEN CRY Two trucks having sex (oh yes) Two trucks having sex (oh yes) My muscles (UH) My muscles (UH) Involuntarily flex Two trucks, having sex (oh yes) Two trucks, having sex (oh yes) my muscles (UH) my muscles (UH) Involuntarily flex RIGHT BY MY SIDE THERE'S ZZ TOP AND ROBERT Z'DAR FROM MANIAC COP 1, 2 and 3 THIS BARBECUE COULD BRING YOU TO YOUR KNEES AND SO COULD THESE TWO TRUCKS Two trucks holding hands Two trucks holding hands The passion, the passion Is more than I can withstand Two trucks holding hands Two trucks holding hands The passion, the passion My big fat heart expands TWO PICKUP TRUCKS ONE CYLINDER BLOCK CRUSH MY BODY LIKE A ROCK SO BEAUTIFUL NO STARS TONIGHT JUST FIREWORKS AND EAGLES IN THE SKY THE FOUNDING FATHERS CRY Two trucks having sex (oh yes) Two trucks having sex (oh yes) my muscles (UH) my muscles (UH) Involuntarily flex Two trucks, having sex (oh yes) Two trucks, having sex (oh yes) my muscles (UH) my muscles (UH) Involuntarily flex Two trucks having sex Two trucks having sex My muscles, my muscles Involuntarily flex Two trucks having sex Two trucks having sex My muscles, my muscles Involuntarily flex Two trucks (having sex) Two trucks (having sex) Two trucks (having sex, having sex, having sex) Two trucks (having sex) Two trucks (having sex) Two trucks (having sex, having sex, having sex)
3.
A mask of my own face. I'd wear that. I'd wear that. I'd wear that mask of my own face. I'd wear that. I'd wear that. I'd wear it to a hoedown, and I'd dance with all the belles, and none of them would know that I was secretly myself. I'd rob my apartment and I wouldn't give a damn. I'd blame it on the person that nobody knows I am. I look into my eyeholes, what do I see? Look into my eyeholes, what do you see? I look into my eyeholes and what do I see? A handsome motherfucker motherfucking looking back at me. A mask of my own face. I'd wear that. I'd wear that. I'd wear that mask of my own face. I'd wear that. I'd wear that. I'd wear it on Thanksgiving and I'd laugh in the parade at all the people hissing, knowing I'm the one they hate. And at the big finale I would tear my face away, and smile as they grip their own and try to do the same. I look into my eyeholes and what do I see? Look into my eyeholes, tell me what you see. I look into my eyeholes and what do I see? A handsome motherfucker motherfucking looking back at me. A mask of my own face. I'd wear that. I'd wear that. I'd wear that mask of my own face. I'd wear that. I'd wear that. I'd wear that mask of my own face. I'd wear that. I'd wear that. I'd wear that mask of my own face. I'd wear that. I'd wear that. I'd wear that mask of my own face. I'd wear that. I'd wear that. I'd wear that mask of my own face. I'd wear that.
4.
Dharma and Greg Who's the Boss? Sanford and Son Happy Days Brotherly Love My Two Dads The Flying Nun Will and Grace Family Matters Step By Step Sister Sister George Lopez Fresh Prince Newhart Frasier Night Court Taxi Martin Webster Friends EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND Everybody EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND Everybody EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND Everybody EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND Yeah, Everybody Loves Raymond Everybody Loves Raymond Everybody Loves Raymond Everybody Loves Raymond Everybody (EVERYBODY EVERYBODY EVERYBODY EVERYBODY) Everybody Loves Raymond EVERYBODY Everybody Loves Raymond EVERYBODY Everybody Loves Raymond EVERYBODY Everybody Must Love Raymond Everybody (EVERYBODY EVERYBODY EVERYBODY EVERYBODY) The Facts of Life King of Queens Saved By the Bell Boy Meets World 8 Simple Rules Growing Pains Kenan and Kel Golden Girls Home Improvement Charles In Charge Suddenly Susan My Mother the Car Good Times Roseanne Yes, Dear Cavemen Joey Seinfeld Full House Alf (Homeboys in Outer Space) EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND Everybody EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND Everybody EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND Everybody EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND Yeah, yeah, yeah Everybody Loves Raymond Everybody Loves Raymond Everybody Loves Raymond Everybody Loves Raymond Everybody (EVERYBODY EVERYBODY EVERYBODY EVERYBODY) Yeah, Everybody Loves Raymond EVERYBODY Everybody Loves Raymond EVERYBODY Everybody Loves Raymond EVERYBODY Everybody Must Love Raymond Everybody (EVERYBODY EVERYBODY EVERYBODY EVERYBODY)
5.
Jaws 04:09
Jaws the shark! Lurking in the dark of the depths of sea, one day on a lark Decides to get rowdy, get real violent Takes a vay-cay up to Amity Island Sunshine lotion fun in sun Blood in the ocean, everybody run Cuz it's crazy how few fucks this shark gives He'll eat naked ladies! He'll eat little kids! Oh no! But the one thing keeping the commmunity safe is a guy named Brody and his pal Richard Dreyfuss Jaws don't know that a storm's gonna come He just wants everyone to be his chum, get it? get it The mayor don't care if the townsfolk die He doesn't want to spoil the fourth of July He's like, "Everyone cool it, and go for swim!" But holy shit here comes that fin!! JAWS IS HERE HERE IS JAWS (He is a shark without a cause) He was in a movie you should watch it it's called Jaws JAWS IS HERE HERE IS JAWS (He is a shark who fights the law) He was in a movie that everyone saw Long story short, the beach gets closed The mayor's like, "Okay, yeah this blows" Suddenly Jaws has got a price on his head But the wrong little shark baby ends up dead It was Jaws' little brother! Now he's pissed The mayor just shot to the top of his list He sneaks in his house in the middle of the night and he eats that fucker in a single bite Golly Now the mayor's dead, so Brody's in charge He knows the real killer is still at large So he and the Dreyfuss make a decision They're going on a mission They're gonna go FISHIN' for Jaws A man named Quint lets them use his boat on the condition that he be the one to cut Jaws' throat Cuz he was a sailor back in World War II And Jaws ate his entire crew, WOAH! JAWS IS HERE HERE IS JAWS (He is a shark without a cause) He was in a movie-- a movie called Jaws! JAWS IS HERE HERE IS JAWS (He is a shark who fights the law) He was in a movie that everyone saw They're out on the sea. They wait all night. Where could Jaws be? He's no where in sight. Dreyfuss decides to go down in a cage and Jaws shows up in a full on rage He tears up the cage like paper in a shredder While Dreyfuss's makes his wetsuit wetter He hides behind a rock like cowardly prick And he doesn't come back until the end of the flick Brody's like, "We're gonna need a bigger boat" So they go home and get a bigger boat The biggest boat that's ever sailed Gonna kick Jaws' ass or I guess his tail. yeah his tail but OH MY SHIT! Jaws jumps out and Quint gets bit! Right in half like a kit-kat bar! Up in the sky there's a shooting star That's Quint up in heaven. He's a star now Brody's angry. He's all like, "Fuck it" He takes a harpoon and welds it to a rocket Jaws' last words are, "Woah-- respect" Then he explodes and it's a pretty good effect, yeah! JAWS IS DEAD LONG LIVE JAWS (He was a shark without a cause) He was in a movie, you should watch it, it's called Jaws JAWS IS DEAD LONG LIVE JAWS (He was a shark who fought the law) He was in a movie that everyone saw (He was in a movie that everyone saw) He was in a movie that everyone saw JAWS IS DEAD LONG LIVE JAWS (He was a shark without a cause) He was in a movie, called Jaws He was in a movie that everyone saw (JAWS IS DEAD) At the Academy Awards (LONG LIVE JAWS) He was robbed (He was a shark without a cause) Sharks exist in real life, woah (He was in a movie that everyone saw) Jaws is dead Long live jaws
6.
My Trains 04:04
My basement, uh. Gonna show you my beautiful basement. Where the concrete floor feels cool to the touch. I'll turn up the heat if it's too much. I'll turn on the lightbulb on the wire. Turn on the dehumidifier. I'm serious when I flick this next switch. Look you in the eye, and I say, "Check this." My trains, uh. My trains, uh. I got small ones. Tiny little trains. I come down here just to get away. My trains, uh. My trains, uh. It's like magic. Magic trains. I wish these trains could take me away. (chugga chugga woo-woo) (chugga chugga woo-woo) (chugga chugga woo-woo) (chugga chugga woo-woo) In the club, the Model Railroad Club, A motherfucker said shit about my trains. Might as well have took a shit on my brain Cuz I went insane. I laid track on his ass with a styrofoam bat. But the president never did let me back after that. Shit, I said, "Fuck you. Who the fuck needs a punk ass choo-choo crew anyhoo?" My trains, uh. My trains, uh. I got small ones. Tiny little trains. I come down here just to get away. My trains, uh. M-m-m-m-my trains, uh. It's like magic. Magic trains. I wish these trains could take me away. (chugga chugga woo-woo) (chugga chugga woo-woo) I lie here every night. I feel like if I focus and think of getting smaller I'll gradually get smaller. And if I get small enough My trains will seem much bigger and I'll be the conductor. The tiniest conductor. OH! Then whatchu gonna do? Then whatchu gonna do? Whatchu gonna do then, huh? Whatchu gonna do? Whatchu gonna do? Whatchu gonna do when I'm fucking small Like one inch tall You won't see me coming at all When I crawl into your ear late at night Yeah, you heard me right motherfucker, sleep tight And you think I'm just another bad dream But I'm a tiny little man in your bloodstream Little hands hold an artery shut Yeah, that's right motherfucker, then what? My trains. My trains. My trains, uh. My trains, uh. I got small ones. Tiny little trains. I come down here just to get away. My trains, uh. My trains, uh. They're like magic. Magic trains. I wish these trains could take me away. (chugga chugga woo-woo) My trains. (chugga chugga woo-woo) My trains. (chugga chugga woo-woo) My trains. (chugga chugga woo-woo) My trains.
7.
BRODYQUEST 03:47
Adrien Brody Adrien Brody Adrien Brody Adrien Brody Adrien Brody Adrien Brody Adrien Brody Adrien Brody Adrien Brody Adrien Brody Adrien Brody Adrien Brody Adrien Brody Adrien Brody Adrien Brody Adrien Brody

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released March 24, 2014

Neil Cicierega

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